Why I Started Hosting Dinners Again
From hosting rooftop hangouts at UIUC to saying no to everything in SF — and why I finally came back to the table.
Why I Started Hosting Dinners Again
There's this moment I love.
When I see two close friends I've introduced pull their chairs closer and ask, "So how do you know Austin?"
The Backstory
Back at UIUC, I hosted casual rooftop hangouts, co-working spaces, and even a pitch competition with My First Million. My sophomore year, I'd started an interview channel — "School of Hard Knocks" style talks with student founders and creators.
After dozens of interviews, I realized: these people had no idea who each other were. So I started hosting hangouts for entrepreneurs — content creators, agency owners, startup founders — anyone working on something cool.
Nothing crazy. I'd get a friend's apartment key, tell everyone to meet there, buy some drinks, and tell people to pull up.
Over time I would see them make viral videos together, start working together, and even become close friends. That was probably the highlight of my year.
Then I Went Dark
For my first 3 months in SF, I said "no" to everything besides Origami, the gym, and side projects.
It was necessary. When you move to a new city to join a startup, you need to earn your seat at the table before you start hosting tables of your own. The heads-down period mattered.
But something was missing.
Coming Back to the Table
Now that I've started hosting dinners again, I've realized something:
Yes, I love Cursor, a Ghost Energy Drink, and the Social Network soundtrack until 3am.
But I also love manually sending 10 texts to get the right people around a table.
What I've Learned About Hosting
The guest list is everything. 6-8 people is the sweet spot. Enough diversity of perspective, small enough that everyone talks to everyone.
Don't overthink the venue. Some of the best conversations I've had were at the cheapest spots. People come for the people, not the food.
Be the bridge. The best thing you can do as a host is introduce two people who should know each other and then get out of the way.
Do it consistently. One dinner is an event. Monthly dinners are a community. The compounding happens when people start coming back.
Work-Life Balance Is Real (Unfortunately)
Techbro discovers work-life balance. Crazy, right?
But for the first time, I feel like I'm experiencing both without sacrificing the other. The engineering work is better because I'm not burned out. The dinners are better because I actually have something to talk about.
Let me know of any SF gems I haven't found yet. Always another seat at the table.